Love Is In The Air

***This post is dedicated to my girl, Jessica-now-officially-Weissman, and all the people out there who are looking for love or who have found love a second, third or fourth, time around!!!

I was in Florida last Saturday. Not for fun in the sun, but to celebrate Jessica’s wedding to her man, Zeev. And, it was fabulous! You’re probably thinking, “Awesome food, lots of alcohol, great music, and a gorgeous backdrop.” That all happens to be true, but that’s not why this weeding was fabulous.

This wedding was amazing because after sharing a life-long friendship with someone, which has endured through the happiest and shittiest of times, I was finally able to see my wonderful friend truly happy. I know. I’m all schmaltzy right now, but I can’t help it. (I really thought my husband killed the schmaltz in me a long time ago…apparently not.)

That’s me and the bride, Jessica, who also happened to be my college roommate once upon a time. She’s my girl.

Jessica is now officially re-married to a great guy, and might I add, an extremely good-looking one at that. Her second husband kicks her first husband’s ass, as did this wedding.

Mr. and Mrs. Zeev Weissman. It’s good to be in love.

In fact, I told Jess and her Mother, Gail, at one point during the wedding, “This wedding kicks your first wedding’s ass.” And, I should know, since I was a bridesmaid in that first wedding.

Jess just smiled, but her Mom responded, “I know. Jess is happy and this wedding is authentic in every way.” Mom always knows best.

While I sat through Jessica and Zeev’s beautiful ceremony, with their children by their sides, I was so overcome with emotion I turned to my new friend, Karen, and said, “Give me one of those tissues.” (I’m actually seeing my new friend next week when she’s in New York.)

Here I am with my new friend, Karen.

And, don’t even get me started on how they gazed into each other’s eyes with love, lust and longing. I literally melted while watching Jess and Zeev during their first dance. I leaned over to Jess’s girls, who I like to think of as my girls now too (we totally bonded), and said in a dreamy way, “I want to be in love.” The girls looked at me like I was nuts.

“Oh shit. I’m already married,” I declared while snapping my fingers, and muttering “Damn.” We all had a good laugh.

Jess and Zeev were both married before, so it’s safe to say they know what they’re doing this time around. Their happiness, love and appreciation for one another was so obvious, it was almost sickening. So totally joking. It was beautiful and that’s what made this wedding so fan-fucking-tastic.

I love seeing my girl’s man on his knees for her. We all deserve to be worshipped like the Goddesses we are!

There is nothing like seeing your life-long friend enjoying the life she deserves after surviving such shit for so long.

When Jess married the man I take great pleasure in calling, Dickhead, we were young, largely unaffected by life, and, in many cases, blind. What you think you know and want at 25 and what you know and want at 40 are so not the same. They may actually be diametrically in opposition to one another. They don’t say, “Youth is wasted on the young,” for nothing.

We look really young. And, I really wish I had appreciated my pre-baby body more.

I know for myself, when I got married at 27, I was soooo idealistic, about everything. Like most of us women, I had lots of expectations that I didn’t even realize at the time I was expecting. Foolishly, I thought, “How could my future in-laws not love me, and I them?” Quite easily, as it turned out.

Letting that jackass of a photographer talk us into photos like this may not have been the best way to kick-start things with the in-laws. Mark looks like he’s praying to G-d I don’t take out his nuts.

And, then there’s this one. I look like I’m dragging Mark to his impending doom. Why didn’t we switch hand positions? This has bugged me for the past 13 years.

This was the first moment Mark saw me in my dress. My dress was too long and I almost tripped. But, I think we have the look of love here.

Things started to get rocky with my in-laws as we got closer to our wedding, when mistakes were made and feelings were hurt. Through the years, this relationship has been our biggest obstacle and main source of discontent. I know there are plenty of you out there who can relate. Luckily, after years of therapy, and some really great drugs, we are all in a good place with one another, and are well past all the old bullshit. Sometimes, I like my in-laws more than my husband.

Of course, I’ve realized some mistakes that I made along the way. Expectations. (And, having opinions, but that’s for another post.) Seriously though, for me I’ve learned if I don’t expect anything, I can’t get disappointed. And, if I’m not disappointed, then there’s nothing to be upset about, and then there’s no place to lay blame. Therefore, all can be good. Actually, this is my thinking with most everything now. See Mark…money well spent at the shrink.

Mark and I have been together for 15 years and have known each other for 30. Some of those years have been great, and some not so great. Sure there are times when I’d like to suffocate him with my pillow while he’s snoring away and I know he’d love to tape my mouth shut, but at some point those feelings pass, and the sound of his breathing no longer bothers me. Like right now. We’re in a good place. So good, that I know we’ll be okay when we hit the next pothole, crater…whatever, in our marriage. Well, at least that’s how I’ve been feeling lately. 😉

My point is, Mark really is a great guy, so I can overlook and ignore a lot of the other stuff that’s seemingly unimportant. I’m also really lucky that he tolerates being the main topic of discussion in many blog posts and articles. (I only poke fun out of love, honey.)

How many guys download Thanksgiving Day meal recipes and actually cook them? My hubby, Mark, does and does it well.

Some are not so lucky, like 50% of us. Lately, I’ve been hearing about more and more divorces that are happening. A lot of them being initiated by the ladies as they enter their 40’s, but that’s for another post. Bottom line…marriage is hard, and can often suck at times. And, there’s always one person who works a little harder than the other. If that’s you, you have to get over it, and be okay with it, if you want your marriage to work. You know I speak the truth.

Unfortunately, my girl,Jess, had to experience divorce, and not an amiable one either. But, I’m not going to go through all the details of her traumatic break-up, painful divorce, and all of Dickhead’s horrendous immature behavior.

What I will say, is throughout everything Jessica was all class. The woman had her ex-in-laws, all of them; Dickhead’s parents, sister and her family, at her wedding to Zeev for fuck’s sake. That is a rare thing to do and takes a big heart. Especially since Dickhead was and is, well, a dickhead in the supreme.

I’ve always told Jess that living well is the best revenge. I’m so happy to see that she took my advice. That girl is definitely living well!!!! Dickhead can suck it!!!!!

That’s right. I’m happy, gorgeous, and I gots myself a reelz man!!!!